Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
