I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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