hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You don't make any sense
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