Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
