Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
How external is "for external use only"?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize