ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
