she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
