So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
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