I will die if light touches me.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Randomize