I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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