i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
