Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
