Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
