I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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