Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms