sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
