After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Randomize
