Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(619): View more from California

I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.

(1-619): View more from California

You literally just made my flesh crawl.

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(310): View more from California

Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.

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(631): View more from New York

im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies

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(402): View more from Nebraska

yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(631): View more from New York

Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it

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(609): View more from New Jersey

please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment

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(315): View more from New York

I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.

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