Texts From Last Night

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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  What are we going to do tonight?

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  What we try to do every night. Take over the world

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  (919): What are we going to do tonight? (704): What we try to do every night. Take over the world http://tfl.nu/y4va
  Replies (30) Good night (4460) Bad night (761)
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  (209): View more from California

  kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.

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  (209): kindergarten is hard when you're hung over. http://tfl.nu/68v6
  Replies (23) Good night (5335) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy

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  (757): Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy http://tfl.nu/p6z3
  Replies (29) Good night (866) Bad night (5069)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?

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  (774): Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id? http://tfl.nu/53ps
  Replies (6) Good night (3569) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.

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  (267): he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice. http://tfl.nu/aht5
  Replies (14) Good night (5158) Bad night (968)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.

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  (760): explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet. http://tfl.nu/b9gi
  Replies (9) Good night (2103) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.

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  (615): He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk. http://tfl.nu/adyj
  Replies (4) Good night (2470) Bad night (876)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."

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  (585): He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry." http://tfl.nu/vnva
  Replies (25) Good night (1747) Bad night (549)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.

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  (815): Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night. http://tfl.nu/jyfi
  Replies (10) Good night (1464) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself

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  (310): Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself http://tfl.nu/zndp
  Replies (5) Good night (1317) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?

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  (940): Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow? http://tfl.nu/gsnf
  Replies (8) Good night (1305) Bad night (391)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  How's my date look?

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Like a retarded elf

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  In a good way

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  (443): How's my date look? (814): Like a retarded elf (814): In a good way http://tfl.nu/jjcc
  Replies (6) Good night (721) Bad night (710)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.

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  (724): It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over. http://tfl.nu/5f4b
  Replies (3) Good night (620) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.

  (1-910): View more from North Carolina

  Next. Level. Shit.

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  (910): I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower. (1-910): Next. Level. Shit. http://tfl.nu/dulw
  Replies (5) Good night (1169) Bad night (247)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.

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  (604): I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants. http://tfl.nu/vm67
  Replies (1) Good night (568) Bad night (208)

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