I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
