why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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