best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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