It's a beautiful day for a hangover
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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