There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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