My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Randomize
