A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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