Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize