Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize