When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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