...so i touched it.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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