my vag is so smooth its legendary
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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