haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
