You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
