took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
