doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
i've created a new STD.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
