isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize