omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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