So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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