Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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