dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
