so I'm never txting u again after today...
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".