Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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