Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
