I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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