Your face is a jimmy john
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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