he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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