I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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