He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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