dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize