My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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