i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
